Survivor Caramoan Season 26 Fans vs. Favorites: Week 6 Write Up and Player Power Rankings

They voted off The Beard!  You bastards!

I was certain that Julia was going home after they finally gave her about 15 seconds of air time…..

Matt’s wishy-washy “I don’t care who goes home as long as it is not me” plan just didn’t have the macht to survive another week.  Peace be with you Mr. Beard!  You will be missed.

In any event, that tribal shuffle was the most one-sided breakdown I have ever seen and it completely reset the game.  Aside from Stiffler’s Mom, every strong physical player ended up with orange dye on their shirts.

I think Corinne actually threw up on herself a little bit when she saw the new lineups.  She had the look of a woman who bought a winning scratch ticket only to get arrested and kicked in the shins when she walked into the lottery office to collect.

On the bright side, the strain of being on a tribe of doomed sissies has finally made Corinne incapable of keeping her yap shut so we stand to get some entertainment as her Chernobyl-esque meltdown commences.  Give em hell Corinne!

You know that your tribe is in trouble when Cochran is your beef.  These guys are screwed.

To the new rankings!

1)      Malcolm

I cannot believe this guy’s luck.  Unless the next few challenges are all World of Warcraft guild raids pitting his tribe against Cochran in his own element, Malcolm can continue to coast for at least 3 more weeks.

He’s got the power tribe.  He’s got an idol.  He’s got the numbers. 

I don’t like the inference that he is cozying up to Reynold though.  Malcolm’s likability is a major asset in the mid-game and if he allies himself with some Delta Bravo that pisses people off, it will almost certainly cause resentment among his old tribe mates.

Also, I think Andrea knows he has the idol.

2)      Brenda

As expected, Brenda is quietly shooting up the longevity charts.  Unlike Reynold or Dipshit Eddie, her gameplay and position didn’t require that she be placed on the power tribe in order to survive but splitting the “Stealth R’ Us” crew up only bolsters her prospects.

Thus far, it certainly appears that “Stealth R’ Brenda” is a far more effective entity than Pinky’s classified alliance that everyone knows about.

3)      Andrea

With any and all stresses removed from her environment, I suspect that Andrea can stop her crying and start scheming again without the burden of emotion.

“I had a dream that you had the idol”? 

Horseshit.  Andrea may have dreams about Malcolm but the bulge in her visions sure as hell does not involve a hidden immunity idol.

Her statement was nothing more than a ploy to see how he reacted to such a thing without actually saying she knows.

The root of the issue is thus:

1)       Is Malcolm enough of an “accomplished liar when it comes to women” to fool a plotter like Andrea?

2)      If she does know Malcolm has the idol, what does she do about it?

The answers to the above questions will determine Andrea’s future in this game now that Corinne has been taken out of the picture for the next few weeks at the very least.

4)      Reynold

Reynold has an opportunity here.

The tribal re-stack just saved his bacon and (unlike his dumbass friend Eddie) he knows it.

The problem with Reynold is that if someone of slightly less than medium-sized brain like Erik sees him as the pompous and shifty “Guy Smiley” that he is, it is almost certain that Andrea and Brenda do as well.

However, barring some really weird challenge or a “both tribes go to tribal” twist, it will be at least 3 weeks before anyone from this tribe sees the council area.

This fact, coupled with his idol, make Reynold our huge climb of the week.

5)      Erik

It is vexing to me that Erik so clearly sees right through Reynold’s façade within minutes of spending any appreciable time with him but foolishly formed a very public bond with a certifiably deranged Brandon Hantz..

Better late than never I guess, but I am beginning to think Erik had better form a side alliance with all the girls if he wants to make anywhere near the finals.

It is impossible for me to tell exactly what Erik’s gameplan might be because Erik doesn’t know what Erik’s gamplan might be.

Still, I really like The Doors so I gotta root for this guy.

6)      Eddie

Ah to live for just a moment in the striking clarity that makes up Eddie’s existence.

The first thing out of Dipshit Eddie’s mouth was not “Man this shuffle really saved my ass” or “This affords me the opportunity to change up my game”  or even “Holy crap!  Our tribe is sick!  We’ll wipe the floor with those guys!”

 No, No, No.  The Unlikable Fireman says, “We’re the good looking tribe”.

The world is not divided into good and evil.  There is no West vs. East, Catholic vs. Protestant; Capitalism vs. Socialism, or Have’s vs Have Nots.

Rightly, everything can and should be divided into “Pretty vs Not Pretty.”

Either the editors caught Eddie sleeping with every one of their wives and husbands and really want to stick it to him in a rage induced thirst for revenge, or this guy is just an arsehole.

Whatever the cause of his negative portrayal, he’s on the strong tribe and has the protection of Reynold, who may realize that Eddie is only guy in the Philippians more unlikable than he is.

We will need to suffer Dumbass Eddie for at least 3 more weeks.

7)      Sherri

Stiffler’s Mom is one of those players that was going to rank at the bottom of whichever tribe she ended up on.

She is weak in challenges, both of her confidants (Laurie and Shamar) were axed by her own alliance, and she comes off as kind of imperious.

While the re-shuffle virtually guarantees that she will make it to the merge (hence her relatively high ranking), Sherri can’t shut the hole in her face around camp. 

One never knows what might happen in this game to shake things up.

Erik might get his flowing locks stuck in a barracuda.  Eddie might finally realize he’s on a reality show and run off into the forest never to be heard from again.  Andrea might panic again for some reason and attempt to oust Malcolm.

Running your mouth about how much you hate the people on your tribe just before the merge is pretty stupid.

Stiffler’s Mom’s list of friends is very thin.  Her ineptitude in challenges is her only protection at this point but in order for that to be effective you have to be off the radar. 

8)      Cochran

Much like the immortal Farmer Ted from the iconic 80’s film Sixteen Candles, Cochran can rightly be labeled “King of the Dipshits”.

Strategically, he is no worse off than he was before the split but since it is almost assured that his tribe will be in council the next 3 weeks under current conditions, he’s gotta rank lower than even Sherri.

The only danger on the horizon for the dungeon master is the fat that 3 people need to leave before the merge and there are only 2 people outside his alliance left as ballast.

I suspect that Phillip and Corinne will snipe at each enough that one of them will end up on the block at the final pre-merge council so I am not overly concerned for Cochran.

9)      Dawn

Unfortunately, Dawn was unable to start a new “no crying” streak this week.

The only person on national TV that I have ever seen cry this much was Rebecca Howe from Cheers. 

It happens so much now that I can no longer remember the context of each breakdown.  I am seriously concerned with Dawn’s ability to stay hydrated with all the moisture she’s losing through her eyes.  It is only for this reason that she rates below Cochran this week.

On the bright side, she is almost certainly incapable of suffering the type of eye injury that resulted in Shamar’s departure.  If sand, or leaves, or monkey poop falls in her eye unexpectedly, there is 73% chance she will already by crying about something and disaster will be averted.

10)   Phillip

“Everyone underestimates me because of my pink panties.”

If I had a nickel for every time I heard that I wouldn’t need to work for The Man.

Phillip may have actually increased his survivability as the remaining members of the Favorites on the tribe of well-meaning bumblers are now entirely reliant upon solidarity to make it to the merge.

I have reversed my position from last week that Corinne would outmuscle him in a power struggle.  The Specialist is surprisingly unflappable during times of stress and can create little fantasies in his own mind to keep him from melting down or lashing out.

He will need this when it comes time to jockey for position at the final pre-merge council and it looks like Corinne’s tenuous ability to stay in her happy place is beginning to collapse.

11)   Corrine

I predicted last week that Corrine would be in serious trouble if the split didn’t go favorable for her.

The only way it might have gone worse is if she ended up as the sole Favorite on a tribe full of Fans.  The look on her face when they lined everyone up after the shuffle was that of a woman getting lined up to get shot and not that of someone eager to get into her new tribe.

Watching Corinne forfeit all semblance of self-control is going to be a blast to watch and her power struggle with The Specialist has the potential to be epic. 

At this moment, Corinne reminds me of Ned Flanders from The Simpsons right before he completely snaps and starts going off on everyone.  Click here and you'll see why I make this comparison .

Being nice causes Corinne physical pain and an explosion is imminent.

I also believe that she has done herself a grave disservice in loudly, proudly, and frequently proclaiming her desire to play the game with “her gay”(Michael).

1)      These repeated statements serve to verbally reduce a strong but unlucky player to nothing more than a reflection of his sexual preference, making Corinne even more unlikable than she already is.

2)      It seems reasonable to infer that she is a flop risk when she says “I need to play the game with a gay” and “I am glad to have my gay”.  A woman in her position should be less concerned with whom Michael likes to bugger and more worried about surviving past the final pre-merge vote. 

Corrine needs to re-discover some Zen or she’s toast.  It is likely she is underestimating Phillip because of his pink panties.

12)   Michael

Poor Michael. 

Not only did he go from a position of power (albeit with fewer numbers) on his tribe but he now has to suffer the dishonor be being Corrine’s “Gay”.

There is nothing like a bitter and disingenuous shrew adopting you as a pet lapdog, and reminding everyone in America that she considers you her bitch.

His only hope is to turn on Julia and then, somehow, seize upon Phillip and Corrine’s dislike for each other and get one of them voted off.

If that can be accomplished, he needs to hope that whoever remains will become so insufferable (Corrine) or so unstable (Phillip) that Dawn and Cochran decide to take Michael to the merge.

Not likely.  Sorry you drew the purple egg.

13)   Julia

I don’t know what is more surprising:

a)      That Julia can talk

Or

b)      She is even more boring after speaking than she was when she said nothing.

To be perfectly honest, I actually jumped in my seat when they showed her alone in front of the camera and what seemed to be words started coming from her mouth. 

I suspect I would have had the same reaction if I returned home and one of the rabbits that infests my yard starting hurling Winston Churchill quotes at me.

It is only the shock at the realization that Julia is still on the island and appears to have the gift of speech that kept me from lapsing into unconsciousness at how boring she is.

It would be quite funny if she made it to the jury though.  I can already see her walking up to question finalists only to be interrupted with shouts of “wait a sec, who the %$#& are you?”

Alas, it will not be so.  Barring a Miracle on Ice style victory in the next challenge or a serious injury to another player, I can’t see any way that what’s her name stays longer that 1 or 2 more weeks.

Matt—Ranked #10 of 14 when voted out in week 6.

Brandon—Ranked #15 out of 15 when voted out week 5

Laurie—Ranked #12 out of 16 when voted out week 4

Shamar—Ranked #17 out 17 when he left the game

Hope—Ranked #17 of 18 when voted out week 3

 Allie—Rated “Poor” when voted out week 2

Francesca—rated “Poor” when voted out week 1

Survivor Caramoan Season 26 Fans vs. Favorites: Week 5 Write Up and Player Power Rankings

The great purging of crazy bastards continues as beloved Brandon Hantz threw himself into the fires of mount doom from whence he came.

Aside from a bunch of yelling and calling The Specialist “bitch” (outbursts, I think, designed to make himself less forgettable than any other 5^th person voted off the island), Brandon essentially rolled over and died.

Good riddance quitter.  There is more to being a Survivor villain than just pounding on your chest, dumping food, and running around like the crazy guy in The Silence of the Lambs. 

You know the difference between Brandon and his far more sinister, skillful, and dangerous Uncle Russell?

Russell would have peed in the beans and pooped in the rice and then made it look like Dawn did it.

With a tribal shuffling imminent, I have no idea what is going to happen this week so the rankings are a total crapshoot.  It all depends upon how things shake down.

Here goes nothing:

1)      Malcolm

I’m a broken record here but Malcolm is playing an outstanding game.  Notice how he, yet again, allowed Phillip the glory position in the reward challenge?

As if Malcolm’s cake needs yet more icing, , Phillip was called out in front of the fans last week by Brandon as being the local puppet master.

Malcolm is the biggest threat on the island even without the idol and yet, somehow, nobody knows about him.

2)      Cochran

Its shuffle time!

Cochran has reached his first big hurdle of the game and is looking very solid to make it to the merge.

Nobody is going to have any desire to see this guy get snuffed until they realize how difficult it is to beat likeable dorks even if they sucked in challenges.

He may drop just before the finals but right now the dungeon master is sitting pretty.

3)      Dawn

Well Dawn’s impressive streak of not crying has ended at 1.

Still, I expect Dawn to cry with great frequency, and watching the crazy man who just dumped all of your food on the ground leave the island must be very difficult for someone of her delicate sensibilities.

I kind of want to drop her a few more spots just as a matter of principle but she, like Cochran, remains strong when tribes get mixed.  With a shuffle coming up, the new groups are going to try to rid themselves of physical and strategic threats, not crying machines, before the merge.

4)      Brenda

And so it begins! 

By doing absolutely nothing strategically, Brenda has positioned herself to have the ability to leach on to wherever the power might be without angering anyone or drawing attention to her game.

She was also the only female member of the Favorites not named Corrine to weeble and cry when Brandon started yelling before the challenge, suggesting to me that she has an advantage over both Dawn and Andrea when it comes to emotional fortitude.  People who aren’t weepy messes when raving lunatics quit the game will probably make smarter decisions down the road.

Brenda has played the only possible way available to her if she wanted to win and has done so flawlessly thus far.

5)      Erik

The big jump of the week belongs to our favorite Jim Morrison lookalike.

Erik was unshackled last week in a strategic sense when the crazy man got sent packing and a numbers shuffle makes him desirable to both the favorite and the remaining fans.

I mean, who doesn’t want a likable nincompoop who excels in challenges as part of their alliance?  He bolsters your numbers and will likely do something really stupid strategically as the end game nears to allow savvy players a clear path to the end?

6)      Andrea

Andrea’s inability to control herself during a period of what should have been unrequited joy is troubling.

She was in no danger of going home, the tribe was about to purge itself of a horrible cancer, and Corrine and Phillip were the ones tasked with handling the paperwork.

It could be that the creepily special moment between Brandon and Probst tugged at her heart and filled Andrea with a feeling of peace and tenderness but I think she is just a wuss.

When the real strain begins, Brenda, Corrine The Shrew, or someone like Dawn to whom emotional breakdowns are quite commonplace are far more likely handle the storm.

7)      Corrine

Welcome back Corrine!

Even though most viewers agreed with her 100% when she spoke for the tribe in their desire to forfeit the challenge, she still managed to remind us of her potential for shrewery. 

I think Phillip, already jealous of her monopoly on butt shots on camera, may have been put off by her taking a strong position on the tribe but I think she can now safely outlast him in a power struggle.

However, being a target is always dangerous no matter who you are.  She needs a favorable split on tribes or this could get ugly.

8)      Reynold

Just when you think Reynold is doomed to spend a tortured 3 weeks cooped up with Brandon in the loser’s cottage, he finds an idol just before a re-stack.

Reynold appears to be both lucky and skilled if not entirely smart with his game.  If he can just find some way to stop oozing pomposity and confiding secrets in Eddie, he may yet be able to keep from having to find an immunity idle every damn week to survive.

I think it’s time that he build a shelter for homeless Filipino children on a neighboring beach or, perhaps, concoct some sort of elixir to make Dawn stop crying or Matt’s beard look a little less like Rasputin’s.

He’s better off than he was, that much is certain, but he really needs a breakdown in “Captain Underpants’ Alliance” to gain any real traction.

9)      Michael

Even with a shuffle appearing to be imminent, it is still a numbers game so I gotta keep Moby down the list a bit.  There is some danger for our bald friend if he ends up in the minority on a new tribe and it gets out that he is something of a leader when it comes to strategy.

That having been said, I like the cut of his jib and believe that he can artfully get his way out of a sticky spot or two.  The fact that he doesn’t look like a meathead who is destined to steamroll people for individual immunity doesn’t hurt.

10)   Matt

Am I the only one who thinks that the skinnier Matt gets, the more he starts to look like Ho Chi Minh?

Matt’s survival in this game hinges upon his and Matt’s ability to identify the rifts in the Favorites tribe and cozy up to the right people.

You know Reynold and Eddie are going to start hitting the campaign trail pretty hard so Moby and The Beard need to show just what a bunch of arseholes Reynold and Eddie are.

11)   Phillip

As expected, Phillip’s game took a serious hit last week as Brandon told everyone on the other tribe the Phillip is the puppet master.  The target just got bigger when the shuffle/merge occurs.

I was, however, more than a little surprised at his ability to suffer the slings and arrows hurled at him by Hantz and keep his cool.

I suspect that all of those years handling the stresses of blending in seamlessly with the locals behind the Iron Curtain during the Cold War have steadied his nerves.  His time in communist countries does (sort of) explain his affinity for pink hammocks……

12)   Eddie

Watching America’s most reviled fireman lounging around in the shelter while his tribemates feverishly searched for the idol has led me to 1 inescapable conclusion:

Eddie simply does not know where he is or what he is doing.

I do not believe it has occurred to him that he is not vacationing with his Frat brother, Reynold, in Bora Bora. 

Watch how confused he looks this week at the fact that there is some bearded guy eating coconuts around him all day or that all of the pretty girls with him when he left the States seem to be disappearing from the beaches. 

Do you think he understands that the people with the huge cameras are not Japanese tourists enamored with his machismo?

I cannot understand why Reynold told this nitwit about the idol.  Eddie doesn’t even know this is a game for a million bucks!  I give it even odds that at the next tribal council he asks Reynold, “Hey man, how come you never wear that cool necklace you found in that tree?  That thing was freaking sweet!”

For whatever reason, Reynold seems intent on taking this guy along for the ride.

13)   Julia

I hope they don’t forget to assign her a new tribe when they shuffle.

14)   Sherri

To be honest, I am just ranking her here because she played herself out of a power position on her own tribe, she doesn’t have an idol, and her ineptitude in challenges remind people that she’s there every week.

If she lands on a tribe with more favorites than fans, Stiffler’s Mom is in serious trouble unless she makes Erik her “Finch”.

Brandon—Ranked #15 out of #15 when voted out week 5

Laurie—Ranked #12 out of 16 when voted out week 4

Shamar—Ranked #17 out 17 when he left the game

Hope—Ranked #17 of 18 when voted out week 3

 Allie—Rated “Poor” when voted out week 2

Francesca—rated “Poor” when voted out week 1

Survivor Caramoan Season 26 Fans vs. Favorites: Week 4 Write Up and Player Power Rankings

This is the way the world ends

This is the way the world ends

This is the way the world ends

Not with a bang but a whimper.

--TS Eliot

Ahhhh Shamar.  Loud, lazy, belligerent, bellicose Shamar.  I cannot possibly think of a more appropriate end to his reign of terror than to see him hop on the back of a boat, suddenly rejuvenated by his outstanding luck in being able to quit without having to actually quit. 

This entire saga with his eye reminded me of the “million dollar wound” combat soldiers would dream of as they perished in the trenches.  Good luck in your new career as a professional wrestler Shamar!

Shamar’s unplanned exit spelled doom for panicky Laurie, already a terrible liability on any challenge that required the use of arms, legs, hands, or feet.  I can’t believe that she ran out of steam trying to open locks…..

The Fans tribe got stronger last week and, maybe, they can even the odds a bit before the merge.  If the previews I keep seeing on CBS are any indication, this may finally be a possibility.

To the rankings!

1)      Malcolm

What a great position for this guy to be in.  He’s got an idol, the unwavering love and dedication of a smitten Corrine, and without a known track record, even Andrea the scheming machine isn’t worrying about his threat potential.

If this isn’t enough for the affable Malcolm, there are 2 crazy people on the island who are almost certain to get offed before anyone starts to consider weeding him out.

What I like most about Malcolm’s game thus far is that he kicks arse in each challenge, but then lets “The Specialist” eke out close victories week after week to absorb much needed glory.

Note to Eddie:  Not all “pretty people” need be stupid and pompous.

2)      Dawn

Dawn hasn’t cried this week or called anyone “a meanie” so I can’t justify any demotion here. 

It was a pretty boring week for Dawn but that’s the fault of editing not the professor.

She’s not going anywhere for a while.

3)      Cochran

I continue to be impressed with both Cochran’s luck and his game thus far.

His tribe is far enough ahead in numbers that he can continue to sit out physical challenges and avoid having his extreme inadequacies spotlighted as befell Laura from the Fans.

When he is finally forced into challenges, it usually involves doing something sissy like opening 1 or 2 locks or squeezing his Ichabod Crane-esque frame between tribe mates on a small platform.

Things are falling in place for this guy right now on all levels and I confess that I hope he sticks around awhile to continue his entertaining and perceptive confidential commentaries.

4)      Corrine

What happened to the spitfire who heaped scorn and venom upon poor Sugar a few seasons back? 

Corrine has become so uncontroversial that she should look into driving race cars like that really boring brown-haired chick from the Fans tribe.

I don’t think the editors did anything but show shots of her butt for the last episode and a half.  If she is not careful, Phillip may become jealous as he is accustomed to the most frequent panty-time on the small-screen.

Laying low may reduce her entertainment value for us, but solidifies her a spot in the top 5 yet again.

5)      Andrea

The last episode focused so heavily on the disintegrating Fans tribe that I have no reason to bump her up or drop her down this week.

I thought it was cute that she got jealous when Phillip gave names to the rest of the tribe.  I too hate it when middle-aged crazy men in pink panties share their emotional largesse with people outside my immediate circle.

I guess this explains why she so remorselessly hit on that poor Filipino gentleman during the reward.  Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…..

6)      Brenda

I believe that Brenda’s position will only become stronger as the game progresses.

It is only a matter of time before the crazy men go crazy, the catty women get catty, and the tribes get mixed up or combined.

A power vacuum benefits Erik and Brenda more than anyone else on the island.

If the tribe is smart, they will either vote her off soon, or make her think that she is an integral part of their alliance, because we have seen what Brenda can do in this game in both challenges and in strategy.

7)      Michael

Our first Fan.

The vote last week shows me that Moby is firmly in control of this tribe. 

Even though he was reluctant to pull the trigger, he acknowledged the wisdom of voting off Laurie if the tribe had any hopes of winning another challenge and saw to it that she was removed.

To top it off, he seems to have a soothing effect on Dipshit Eddie so if they decide to start up “The Man Show” he will have their gratitude and respect.

Nobody from either tribe is looking at Michael as a personal threat and this should enable him to go deep in the game if any fans make it to the merge.

If he and Matt are smart, they dump the ladies and team up with Reynold and Eddie.  If the pompous and unlikeable meathead guys make it to the group of 10, everyone is going to be gunning for them first, buying Moby and the Beard 2 more tribals at the least.

8)      Matt

I have no idea how this guy can do all these water challenges. 

That beard has to weigh like 80 pounds when waterlogged.  He’s going to have neck muscles like Hulk Hogan before this season ends if he makes it a few more weeks.

While it was Matt who championed the “get rid of the dead weight” strategy during last week’s tribal, it was Michael who made the ultimate decision so it's not like he's running the show here.

Matt has been pretty wishy-washy this season and I believe that even his buddy Michael is starting to think he may be too flaky to be relied upon.

9)      Julia

She may be boring, but…..

well……

uh……

Did I mention she drives race cars?

10)   Phillip

Let me tell you why I keep putting Phillip near the bottom of the Favorites.

Even before the semi-spoiler previews came out for this week’s episode, I always knew that Phillip and Brandon would eventually meet in a battle of craziness.

Even if Phillip isn’t the one acting crazy when the battle occurs, it draws attention to his foibles nonetheless.

It’s kind of like when you go to a nice restaurant on a date with some chick you don’t really know.  If she starts freaking out and screaming gibberish, the people watching the exchange  assume that you are in some way responsible for her behavior or, perhaps, are equally as demented.

If and when it comes to a head, Phillip may survive the encounter, but since everyone already knows he is a dellusional mad-man, he will be damaged nonetheless.

A difficult exchange with Smeagol may be just the thing to finally break The Specialist's already tenuous hold on sanity.
 

11)      Erik

Given what I have seen thus far, Erik has a number of things going against him:

1)      He is on the outs with the current dominant alliance
2)      He wears the same hairstyle he did 4 years ago when he was making dumb decisions.  If the hair is the same after all this time, why should we expect a change in his decision-making skills?
3)      He is a badass in challenges which means, should he make it to the merge, he will be viewed as a threat.

He is not as savvy as Brenda and may not be able to exploit an opening as readily unless she drags him with her.  In this event, he becomes Brenda’s monkey and is really no more powerful than he already is in this game.

The best thing he can do now is to get in a fist fight with Brandon while protecting Dawn and Cochran from a beat down.

 

12)      Sherri

Just as she jumped up the board last week so has she dropped down this round.

Shamar’s early departure was crippling to Stiffler’s Mom in 2 ways:

1)       Just as she was his champion so was he hers.  Without his vote, she is now at the whim of Michael and Matt as to how the tribe goes forward
2)      Shamar’s absence allowed Laurie to get wiped out for being dead weight.  As I recall, Sherri was the only person on either tribe to miss breaking her tile on the first try.  She knows she is a liability and so does everyone else.

 

The winds are changing on the Fans tribe and if they lose another close challenge due to a gaffe on her part, her days are over.  

 

13)   Eddie

As much as it pains me to move up a guy who seems to believe that the world is and should be divided between those who are pretty and those who are not, I am compelled to kick his rank up a notch.

There is a very real possibility that the tribal loyalties will reform as Matt and Michael are confronted with the possibility of taking likable and non-threatening women to the merge with even fewer numbers.

Plus Eddie is really dumb so nobody is worried about some glorious ruse or clever coup from this guy.  If I could, I would rate him and Stiffler’s mom and 12A and 12B but I’m not a candy-ass when it comes to prognostication.

14)   Reynold

 

            With the end so near for the bag-tosser, I have been considering Reynold's play thus far:

            1)      It was not Reynold but Eddie who founded the alliance of good-looking donkeys.

            2)      Reynold almost singlehandedly won 3 challenges that his teammates botched out of the
                  gate.

            3)      He works very hard around camp and was generally friendly to everyone except Shamar,
                  who was deserving of disdain for his behavior and work ethic.

Reynold's trouble boils down to his violating one of the cardinal sins of Survivor:

If you argue with an idiot, people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Despite all he has done for his tribe, he will be remembered as the guy who brought drama to the camp by sparring with the Drill Sergeant and this will knock him out before dipshit Eddie the mathematically challenged fireman.

His only hope is to talk Matt and Michael into a “Man Show” alliance of strength.  If he fails at this, or if the tribes do not re-shuffle, he is done at the next vote.

15)   Brandon

We have all seen what happens next week and I must confess that I am extremely disappointed in Brandon.

Anybody can dump rice and beans on the ground.

It takes a REAL man to pee and poop in other people’s food.

What a bait and switch.

For shame Brandon.  For shame.

Laurie—Ranked #12 out of 16 when voted out week 4

Shamar—Ranked #17 out 17 when he left the game

Hope—Ranked #17 of 18 when voted out week 3

 Allie—Rated “Poor” when voted out week 2

Francesca—rated “Poor” when voted out week 1