Sadder still, we have a final game that (in the words of another pro football blogger) pits "America's biggest cheaters against America's poorest winners."
In times past, following a stretch of abysmal prognostication results, I have opted to eschew reason and logic and foolishly follow my gut, almost invariably to similar, catastrophic results.
So with this proud and time honored tradition of harnessing my inner 15-year old girl as a backdrop, I was prepared to make a pick for causes utterly bereft of reason.
The problem is this. I hate both of these teams. A lot. And my heart would rather exit my body out of my arse than allow even a single positive thought enter my mind in regards to either of these teams.
however, since I am neither a foreigner or a liar, I can't watch anything event with interest without preferring a certain outcome.
So how do I chose? Who gets the curse of my largesse this year?
The Seahawks.
How did I make this determination you ask? Simple.
I started by looking at a compilation of villains that, in my mind, represent the two franchises best <see example below>.
In the NFL, it is widely known that all teams aside from the Denver Broncos consist almost solely of buttholes.
But as is the case in movies, in sports, and in life, there are different proportions to the evil of those who do not play for or root for the Broncos.
In terms of Disney villains, for example, Seattle is this guy:
Boorish, loudmouth, pompous, self-important, and insufferable. Yep. That's the Hawks |
gets caught cheating over and over again and then says, "Oh great...now I'm the bad guy." |
It's painful to even think about enduring those ass-hats for another year. |
Conversely, if the Patriots win, it will be more like this:
There can be no joy for any human beings if new England wins again after the crap they have pulled for the last 13 years. |
Go 'Hawks :( and give me the 1 point.